What's The Project?
A collection of totally woke, anatomically informed, female-pleasure-centered book recommendations, excerpts, and short stories.
How It All Started
I had one of those back-burner projects. You know the kind you love but don't actually do? My project was to write a romance novel set in a sex toy store. I finally got around to doing some research. It just so happened that I started with Laurie Mintz's Becoming Cliterate-Why Orgasm Equality Matters--and How to Get It.
The Penetration Problem
I used to joke to my wife that I bet lesbians had better sex than heterosexual women, but I didn't really believe it until I read Becoming Cliterate. There's no proof that lesbians have better sex, but women who sleep with women do orgasm more reliably.
What's up with that?!
Mintz says it's our society's obsession with penetration paired with the fact that penetration isn't a woman's best route to orgasm. It's like we said, This is what sex should be. (Fine print: this isn't going to do it for you, and it's going to leave your man feeling like he doesn't have the right equipment.)
Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First: A Thinking Man's Guide to Sex, writes "Making love to a woman with your penis is like writing calligraphy with a thick Magic Marker."
"Making love to a woman with your penis is like writing calligraphy with a thick Magic Marker."
Kerner went on to say, “Any sex therapist will tell you that the number one complaint they hear over and over from women is of an inability to experience orgasm during penis-vagina."
I kept researching and learned:
Most women don’t reach orgasm from penetration alone.
Almost no women cite penetration as their most reliable path to orgasm.
88-99% of women don't use penetration while masturbating.
The vaginal canal contains relatively few nerve endings.
The clitoris is a complex anatomical structure that extends throughout the pelvic region. Only a tiny part is visible.
Women take between 15 to 45 minutes to reach orgasm.
I started counting the number of times I saw a woman on TV (don't get me started on porn) come to a screaming orgasm in a half a minute through penetration alone. Nope. That's not how it happens for most women. Help me be an expert.
What do you do when you learn fascinating stuff about sex? Offer to present that information at conference you've previously been too intimidated to attend? That's what I did.
At this year's Romance Writers of American conference, I'm giving a presentation called "A Lesbian's Guide to Straight Sex: Make Your Heros Better Lovers with Tips from a Sapphic Sister." I know folks will ask for reading recommendations. I have some, but I want the selection to be wider than my own reading preferences. That's where you come in.
Here's Where You Come In
I want to gather every hot, clitoris-focused sex scene I can find! I want cliterate writing and cliterate book recommendations. The scenes can be heterosexual, lesbian, ace, bisexual, trans, polyamorous or other. They have to be enthusiastically consensual and focus on women's pleasure. Here's what I'd like:
250 words of a sex scene that is strongly focused on women's pleasure along with a link to the work. Be sure you have your/the publisher's permission to share. Unpublished, indie, and Watt Pad welcome!
A book review for a book you love that has "cliterate" sexual content. Give us at least one page recommendation or Kindle marker so we can jump to a good part.
Submission will be gently vetted, but basically I'm looking for woman-centered, anatomically literate, respectful (which isn't necessarily to same tame). Contact me and let me know what you've got. Let's share the word about real, female pleasure.
A link to the collection will be shared in my materials at the Romance Writers of America conference and at any other appearances. See Appearances for a list of previous speaking engagements.